| Other homeschooler's blogs make me feel like such a | | | | than we do looking at the exhibits. Their kids are |
| slacker. Like Ava, who is a translator. Her husband, | | | | docents at three museums and a private collection of |
| Carl, is a biologist who specializes in diseases of plants. | | | | Faberge Eggs. Imperial Eggs.The eight missing ones. |
| This year, they're educating their three kids via field | | | | We have a Black Lab and three cats. They have a |
| trips to the Louvre and strolls along the | | | | Giant Gambian Pouched Rat, a Komodo Dragon, |
| Champs-Elysees, because she's translating books | | | | several hedgehogs and a platypus. Laying eggs. It's |
| from Arabic to French and he's fighting grape blight or | | | | their science fair project at the homeschooler's |
| blot or rot or something. Anyway, whatever it is, it | | | | science fair. We don't attend ours, ever since the |
| makes the wine bitter and undrinkable, so he's my man. | | | | unfortunate incident with the manure vs chemical |
| Sometimes, life is a Cabernet, non? | | | | fertilizer experiment. Who knew it had to be aged? |
| They're both so intelligent that they have to drink three | | | | We play Mario Tennis. They play polo with real ponies |
| glasses of wine and take a Benadryl to talk to ordinary | | | | and several members of royalty. We spend hours |
| people like me. On Thanksgiving this year, I assume | | | | wading in tide pools, but never remember to bring our |
| they hit the Beaujolais and then composed a "what our | | | | marine biology book, so all we can identify are crabs |
| kids are doing in homeschool" post as they digested | | | | and those brown wiggly things with all the legs. |
| their dinde roti and sauce de myrtille. Sandwiched in | | | | Sandworms? Clamworms? Well, they're ugly as sin |
| between photos of French street scenes with tiny | | | | and can give you a painful pinch, we know that. They |
| figures that might have been them or might have been | | | | often do research for the Cousteau Society. In a shark |
| almost anyone, including pigeons, were lists of what | | | | cage. With the door open. |
| their kids were up to. I swear they only do it to make | | | | Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating a little here, but |
| unschoolers like me feel inadequate. | | | | honestly, this is what it feels like sometimes, when I |
| My kids are very artistic, but they've never shown any | | | | read all the blog posts about museums toured, |
| interest in art history or anyone else's art. Their kids | | | | concerts attended, instruments mastered, classics |
| are making a copy of the Empress Theodora and her | | | | read, projects completed, esoteric knowledge acquired |
| retinue, a mosaic which appears on the south wall of | | | | and businesses in operation. Doesn't anyone else just |
| the apse at San Vitale. Life-sized. In their hotel room. | | | | hang out with each other most of the time? Visit with |
| With pieces they manufacture themselves by breaking | | | | friends? Read for pleasure? Make things just for the |
| bottles, ashtrays, ceramic soap dishes and cough | | | | heck of it, not because they're projects or educational? |
| lozenges. (The picture of it is kind of dark, but I believe I | | | | Consider Jeopardy or Good Eats or If Walls Could |
| can just make out the Smith Brothers logo on one of | | | | Talk highly educational? Doesn't anyone take a walk |
| the red robes.) | | | | without a field guide? |
| My kids go to the library and get books about | | | | Sure, we get a lot of non-fiction out of the library |
| Pokemon, the latest fantasy novel, Barbie and fairies. | | | | every week and my kids are both very creative, but |
| Their kids write books like "Deforestation and its | | | | we're pikers compared to what seems to be the norm |
| Impact on Biodiversity, Habitat loss, Trade and | | | | in the homeschooling blogosphere. I have this recurring |
| Endangered Species." With footnotes. In Latin. I'm only | | | | nightmare that my kids are going to turn 18 and sue |
| up to page 568, but I can tell you, we won't be getting | | | | me for not making them learn more. Oh wait, didn't I |
| any mahogany furniture anytime soon. | | | | just read that a 10 year old homeschooler did that? |
| We visit museums and spend more time arguing about | | | | And represented himself. In a Class Action Suit. Tough |
| whether the blinds are made out of aluminum or plastic | | | | luck, Ava and Carl. |